What is it about vintage that’s got everyone’s panties up in a knot? It’s like those ridiculous platforms paraded on catwalks a season or two ago that broke those models’ walks left right and centre and got you all tsk-tsk on your couch. Then a few months later, you found yourself caressing a pair of those at the neighbourhood mall. And don’t forget those Uggs from years back. Remember when Pamela Anderson first wore them (yes, they’ve been around since the time when Pam was still somewhat relevant) and everyone totally rolled their eyes and called them Fugly and guess what, they’re still around, and you probably own a pair. Look closely enough, this vintage thing is spreading in the same insidious manner in what I call the 5 stages of product insinuation. Indifference, derision, acceptance, embraciveness (should be a word, no?), and ultimately culminate in a state of obsession. Which stage are you in right now? If you’re on this site, it’s probably too late. It’s everywhere. The images, ambiance, atmosphere, and everything associated with those bygone eras have already seeped into our collective psyche. Here’s some cold hard facts that signals the cemented status of all things vintage.
1. Fashion throwbacks. In true testament to the old adage that nothing comes out of nothing, inspiration-starved fashion designers always, always reach back to the dependable good-old days after they are done mediating on the profoundness of geometry, the state of Amazonian rain forests, or whatever. Evolution is king, and fashion evolution is no more than a journey that takes three steps forward and two steps back. Thus, treasure hunting through patterns of the past is no surprise. John Galliano, Vivienne Westwood, etc, have all been “inspired” by the past.
2. Old packaging stuff. I’m not sure if a concerted effort to evoke the past is truly an act of a cultured individual, or merely a marketing gimmick. But everyone, from small time art and craft stores, to big box public traded companies (but they wouldn’t want you to know that), are packaging their products in old newspaper, wax paper, and whatever recycled old stuff they can find. Can’t turn back the clock, might as well savor the packaging. Etsy exemplifies such madness. Pin-ups printed on light switches, pin-up collages, vintage buttons, zippers, toilet plugs, whatever.
3. Pop stars. To “make it” nowadays, it’s not enough just to have a good publicist team to hype you, nutritionist, trainer and cook to sculpt and feed you, a team of professional hair and makeup people to standardize your face, and some computer nerds to Photoshop the hell out of your next album cover anymore. To be the next IT, you need a “personality”. For those void of such prerequisite, going “vintage”, or “retro” (there is a difference, for some definition brush-up, read here) might just provide the jump start needed. Insert a European prefix or stick some random non-sensical letters in your last name, don a theme-driven, sexually suggestive costume that merely evoke what one dare not speak of (in case you’re selling to Disney kids and soccer moms), will provide you with the requisite aura of très mystérieux.
4. Still in doubt? Check your local Gap, American Eagles, Urban Outfitters for a piece of vintage cool at 14.99. Vintage influence is quickly trickling down to High Street, and those stores are actively stealing designing the next big thing.
5. The obscure has become the mainstream pretending to be obscure. If everyone digs it because it’s obscure, then won’t this just turn to another instance of Emperor wearing (mainstream) vintage clothes?
6. Because it appeals to, well, everyone. The warm and fuzzy inclusiveness of the word vintage at once democratizes and divides through gender, racial, class, and cultural lines. The richie rich kids feel cool paring their Louboutin with that 7 dollar kaftan from Second Best Chic or whatever, thus retaining their indie cred. The poor kids feel better, since shopping vintage sugarcoats the practice of secondhand shopping, masking the frugality of such pursuit. And depending on the angle, vintage can be worn as a tribute to a wide variety of tribes: grunge or emo, chauvinistic or androgynous, elitist or common. It allows everyone to talk to each other, even if it means talking right past each other.
Rich girl: Oh that Chanel bag is so darling! I saw one just like that at this hole-in-the-wall vintage place on the Upper East Side, the one with those amazing chandeliers and the purple velvet dressing room curtains, and those delish raspberry tarts served by this midget butler and, oh dear, have I made you cry? There’s no need to cry, here’s my Hermès handkie.
Poor girl: Yo crazy, girlfriend, I’m laughing so hard I’m … This is my 3 dollar pleather CHANNEL from Goodwill. Yo crazy ho you!
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